Wanting What I Can’t Have

Ever notice
how you don’t really notice something until it’s gone? (I think there’s a song
out there that says something like that, but I can’t remember it exactly.) It
has always been around, but you never really realized it until you couldn’t
have it anymore. Why is it that so often the things we desperately long for are
things we cannot have. I decided to give up soft drinks for forty days in an
effort to pray for trafficking and slavery around the world. My office sells
soft drinks to students every day. In the past, I never really thought much
about it, but as soon as I “forbade” myself from having them, it was like some
dragon from deep within me starting roaring for a coke.
Just
hearing the top pop is enough to make my mouth water. Even talking about it now
makes me long for a coke. I’ve thought a lot about this (maybe too much
actually). The Bible talks a lot about waiting. Delayed Gratification. In my
life, the longer I pray about something, and the longer I have to wait for it,
the greater the longing becomes.
I’ll be
honest, I hate to wait! I get irritated if the “fast food” line backs up
causing me to wait. I abhor traffic because it causes me to wait. I don’t like
waiting for my teachers to grade my papers, for the light to turn green, and on
and on the list goes. I suppose that God continues to make me wait on more
important requests to develop a spirit of patience in me (trust me, I am not
there yet!).
So, in the meantime,
I begin drooling (not really but my mouth really does start watering) whenever
I even think about a coke — don’t even mention the word “Dr. Pepper” or there’s
no telling what might happen. But along with my discomfort, I am moved to pray.
While I miss such a simple pleasure, others are longing for their next meal,
longing for freedom, longing for love and acceptance. My trivial longings for a
coke pale in comparison.
So I wait
in hopes that God will hear my prayers and bring healing and freedom (physical
and spiritual) to those who are trapped in slavery. Still, I am waiting.

3 Comments

  1. I'm going without sodas right now as well. Not necessarily for Lent, but sometime in February I decided to go without until Memorial Day.

    I believe the song you're thinking of is "Don't Know What You Got (til It's Gone)" by 80s hair band Cinderella. I knew that instantly. Not sure what that says about me.

  2. Wow, your last few lines really puts it into perspective, Nat. I've been whining over no cokes, sugar, etc for the sake of just losing weight and now I'm totally convicted after reading this. I love what you are doing on behalf of others. That is really beautiful.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

I accept the Privacy Policy

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.