Finding Meaning in Grief

I often talk to client’s about David Kessler’s Sixth Stage of Grief — finding meaning. While God has brought transformational healing in my life, he continues to show me meaning in my own grief. On the one year anniversary of my first husband, Michael’s death, we planted a tree in his memory. This same day, our daughter was baptized. This was incredibly meaningful for me as it symbolized new life in the midst of great pain.

Fast forward to last month. Our counseling center hosted a Walk 4 Hope 5K to raise awareness for suicide prevention. We wanted people who had lost loved ones to suicide and those who attempted and survived to know they are not alone. We wanted to bear witness to each other’s pain in attempt to promote hope.

The walk in and of itself was incredibly powerful to me. The number of people who participated was far beyond what we anticipated. However, the end of the walk was what spoke to me the most. We ended the walk at Michael’s tree. Participants wrote messages of hope that were tied to the tree. A tree that was birthed out of devastating loss was now considered the “hope tree.” Only God.

As I stood with my daughter and my husband, Jeff, I couldn’t help but be amazed at God’s goodness. He turned our weeping to laughing and our mourning to dancing. He used our deepest hurts to promote hope for others. Never in a million years would I have ever dreamed God would continue to use Michael’s life as well as his suicide to help others find hope. Only God.

The proceeds from our walk will provide counseling to people in our community who couldn’t afford it otherwise. The walk will continue to offer hope in the months to come because of the generosity of its participants. Only God.

Wherever you are in your grief journey, if you look for meaning, you will find it. How has your loved one continued to impact your life today? How are you different? Look for anything good that might come from the loss — there you will find meaning.